Yearly Reflection-

As the last day of 1991, I'd like to say it has been a wonderful year and I look forward to 1992. I predict it will be a triumphant year, with many new advances in technology, medicine and the arts. On a more personal note, as I smoke this cuban cigar in my 35th floor high-rise apartment, I step back and take a look at what life really means at the end of the year. A new beginning, a fresh start, a dividing line in all our lives that can lead to better or for worse. But being the head chairman of a major company employing thousands of people, I have come to realize I hate every last employee, every associate, the CEO's, the secretaries, the god forsaken and ignorant business partners. Their like leeches. Blood sucking ticks, that thrive off your very body and soul, sucking every last bit of life out of you, until you are no longer a man, but a ghost, a skeleton from the past. Sometimes I can hardly recognize my own withered face. Stan McAllister took his own life last New Years Eve, by breaking into the company presidents office and slitting his wrists. And to an extent, I am jealous of his courage. He got out. But my feeble self will and cowardice would never allow me to commit such an act. I am much less a man than he was. I just want to sell it all and get a beach house in Bermuda. Escape with my millions and never look back. Buy a small fishing boat and spend my days relaxing in the sun. If you could see me now, you would see the tears running down my face and dripping onto my $900 suit, sipping wine that costs more than your house, all alone on my genuine italian leather couch. It has been a wonderful year, and 1991, I bid you farewell. But now, I have some video cassete tapes to return.

I Am Not Alone- by: unknown forgotten

Like a robot swimming in water
Like a statue climbing out of the sand
The blue shady ocean horizon
The blistering sky of the desert land
They reach across the world
And they grasp hands together
Smooth marble fingers and cold metal plates
Just another part of the great machine
Embracing somewhere in the great divide

It would be absurd if we did not understand both angels and devils, since we invented them.

Our species is the only creative species, and it has only one creative instrument, the individual mind and spirit of a man. Nothing was ever created by two men. There are no good collaborations, whether in music, in art, in poetry, in mathematics, in philosophy. Once the miracle of creation has taken place, the group can build and extend it, but the group never invents anything. The preciousness lies in the lonely mind of man.

-John Steinbeck

Jaunt- by: unknown forgotten

Black coffee
Hats off to you
I'll break your glasses with my shoe

Dirty laundry
I'm talking to you
I'll break your hand with my shoe

Playful mockery
They'll take care of you
I'll break your soul with my heel

I love you really
We're playing with you
I'll break your heart with how I feel

Concrete Tide- by: unknown forgotten

The people are dressed up
and they're up to no good
They're riding that old concrete wave
It's rippling to the future
Like a monsoon of the interstate
Road rash crumbling highways splash
Flowing ever towards downtown
Double yellow lines rolling like massive hills all around
It's a tidal wave into the future
all the people are getting ready for the worst
Their neck ties are their compass's
to ride the tide down south to prosper
The current will glide them easily
in their cars and surfboards alike
They're wearing their nice shoes tonight
They're holding up liqour stores
Hoarding all they can get
and preparing to ride this concrete wave into the future

It's like something I can't really feel.

Where are you going?
No.
Where are you going?
So this is it.
I'll take a cab.
Where are you going?
No.
It's too late to be tomorrow.
There's too much sound to hear the ocean.

Transit- by: unknown forgotten

Walking up the sidewalk
On the raining hill
My shoes were hard
My heels were bruised
The crunch of miniscule pebbles under each step
The slow drops of rain from above
Every heaving breathe controlled and reduced
Step by step walking back home
Every so often looking back for no reason
Not so often looking up off the ground ahead
Climbing the concrete to reach my destination
A little pain in my head makes me uneasy
Stiff shoes pinching my toes
These old pants have a scuff on one knee
No one noticed it
It wouldn't matter anyway

Everybody Knows- by: Leonard Cohen

Everybody knows that the dice are loaded
Everybody rolls with their fingers crossed
Everybody knows that the war is over
Everybody knows the good guys lost
Everybody knows the fight was fixed
The poor stay poor, the rich get rich
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows that the boat is leaking
Everybody knows that the captain lied
Everybody got this broken feeling
Like their father or their dog just died

Everybody talking to their pockets
Everybody wants a box of chocolates
And a long stem rose
Everybody knows

Everybody knows that you love me baby
Everybody knows that you really do
Everybody knows that you've been faithful
Ah give or take a night or two
Everybody knows you've been discreet
But there were so many people you just had to meet
Without your clothes
And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

And everybody knows that it's now or never
Everybody knows that it's me or you
And everybody knows that you live forever
Ah when you've done a line or two
Everybody knows the deal is rotten
Old Black Joe's still pickin' cotton
For your ribbons and bows
And everybody knows

And everybody knows that the Plague is coming
Everybody knows that it's moving fast
Everybody knows that the naked man and woman
Are just a shining artifact of the past
Everybody knows the scene is dead
But there's gonna be a meter on your bed
That will disclose
What everybody knows

And everybody knows that you're in trouble
Everybody knows what you've been through
From the bloody cross on top of Calvary
To the beach of Malibu
Everybody knows it's coming apart
Take one last look at this Sacred Heart
Before it blows
And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Oh everybody knows, everybody knows
That's how it goes
Everybody knows

Everybody knows

Where I Was Born- by: unknown forgotten

There was a dark magic there by the river
In the spot where the moss covers everything upon the banks
The open space where the earthen floor is open and un-treed
Walls of moss laden rocks surround the plot
But they allow a natural narrow entrance to the wicked place
It opens up to reveal a small dark lawn of thick deep moss
Several brooding willow trees hang darkly over it's head
Virtually blocking all sunlight from ever reaching ground
Atop the surrounding boulders small thickets and bushes have made
Thorns and thistles stop anything from climbing atop
And by the river the water runs smooth at a near stop
It's depth is unreachable and infinite right from the shore
It's entire pool so black as it can't be seen through
It's filled with chilled water cold as ice no matter what time of year
Only the entrance has any welcoming trait
For through it you see across to the white raging river and sunlight rippling down
This is what is enticing, the beautiful roaring scene across the way, it seems so distant, so bright
But once you enter the place darkness falls on your face
The temperature drops to an extreme discomfort and shoots shivers down your back
In the very center you notice a fire pit full of cold gray ash
Black embers leftover from god knows what witches plight
You could stand for but a minute and it would feel of hours, days, maybe even weeks
You eyes peeling hardly to look further into the waters you saw from outside
But now it looks less like raging water than could have imagined before
But of an evil surge that tricks the eye and where black magic runs through and reigns
Perhaps you see a violent blue dragon flying quickly where bubbling white water was
Or a pack of fiery white lions rushing by, their manes flying wildly and largely in the wind
The flies over the water grow more numerous and thicken by the second
Their buzzing sound getting louder all the time until it's all you can hear
Swarms of black clouds circle and hover out above the water
Until one massive cloud blocks your entire sight of the outside out
The black pool by the shore by which you've been standing near now begins to churn with uncanny power
Salamanders of black bubble up from it's depths
Hundreds upon thousands squirming in and out, all through the deep green moss
Their slimy bodies piling up cover the entire earth floor
They writhe in the fire pit's ashes until the pit erupts in an massive manner
Flames reach to the willow trees singing their lowest leaves
The salamanders squeal as it dries and burns their skin
And in not but a moment the flies come rushing to it's bright light
The entire place is consumed in frenzy with nowhere to duck or hide
You fall to the ground for cover and the salamanders wet and cold cling to your skin
In the writhing mass you can cry out to heaven but it won't do a thing
In the hellish place you can run to the entrance but it won't ever be found
You can cling and attempt to climb the walls but the shedding moss will drop you down
You can jump to the waters but the salamanders will pull you under to the depths
Or you can stand and let the flies do the devouring in a painful manner of minutes
The only thing one can do once they've entered and seen this place
Is throw their body on the fire as a self sacrifice and lay themselves down to eternal rest

This is where my evil clad mother of a black heart conceived me that cursed day so long ago
With all the other cultic witches present to cast spells and perform chants
They rejoiced when I was pulled from the womb and the fire burned white
Stories say a black salamander crawled out from my mouth and gave me first breathe
Then they presented my soul to Beelzebub, the lord of the flies in hell
My mother died that very same day in the way of ancient ritual rights
She lowered herself into the black pool and sank to the depths with the salamanders forever to stay
And this is why my eyes are black and my heart so dead and cold
For I was cursed from the start I had no choice when I was born

Reminiscing What I Never Knew- by: unknown forgotten

Out the window I watch the wind blow the tree's vigorously
I'm like a falling leaf blowing in the wind
Just trying to fit in like the rest

I have not but one year and one half past in this place
Nothing to look back to
Nothing to reminisce
Only what I've lived

My California dreams are forgotten
A past that lingers somewhere in the distance
Only of hate and love lost
I live only in the present trying to live
And everyday day forget a little bit of those California dreams

My life consists of but one year and one half
None of which have been so great to recall
Sure people I've met, places I've gone
But nothing I can hold to the heart
Nothing I can hold to my heart

There's a lot of nostalgia in these winter months
We huddle inside and tell stories I never knew
I've got nothing but one year and one half
And nothing worthwhile to say
I've nothing worthwhile to say

We remember the way things were
They make us glad
Then we remember the way things were
They make us sad
We look around and see the changes so hard
We look to the moon contemplating what happened when
What went right
What went wrong

The Black Crow- by: Songs:Ohia

through sparrow black wind
a dead crow calls out to his wing
we were lightning across the whole world
we were lightning
and the guise to black cats we made a cross when our shadows met
and the guise to black cats we made a pact when our shadows passed
through sparrow black wind
a dead crow calls out to its wings
I'm getting weaker I'm getting thin
I hate how obvious I have been
I'm getting weaker
and I look down and see the whole world
and it's fading

Speechless- by: unknown forgotten

It was sometime after I met you
That I ran out of things to say
The silence sustained inevitably
And we just sat there motionless
It was always this way
I'm just guessing
But did you run out of things to say too?

Before I met you
I could talk endlessly for hours
Chitter chatter about nothing
But then I met you
And I had nothing to say
And I think that was when I went insane

Salted Golden- by: unknown forgotten

We are salted gods
With the burnt edges of beauty
And the sweet aroma of destructive power
Our oven called heaven burns blistering hot with our vengeful wrath
Taste us and you will see how we will conquer
Taste us and try and turn away
You will come running back
For you will be fulfilled with our salted love
You'll lick your lips and tremble at our delicious flavor
We are salted gods!
Bow down before us!
Lick your wrist and down tequila!
We are salted gods
You have no choice but to love us

The Fun Gun- by: unknown forgotten

What's it take to find a good old fashioned sock
Tick, tock, tick ,tock
Running barefoot around the block

No worries child
No worries Mr. Fancy Pants
And Granny Oldenugly

We have the fun gun
Pulled the trigger
Shot all our friends
BOOM!

We have the fun gun
Aim it at our heads
To get something done
BOOM!

Hahaha,
Giggle, giggle
You little chicken shit dumplings
It's fun!

You spastic jerkoffs
Let's be best buds
Take turns firing off the fun gun
We better run!
BOOM!

Do what you feel
Whatever's in the moment
Don't waste a second
Because it could all be gone before you know it
Impluse is ambition
Let's you know you're alive
Do it if you know it's right

Not the Death & Taxes- by: unknown forgotten

It's like a cultic ritual
Without the sacrifice
More like a cultural tradition
Without the history
Perhaps it's just a habit
Without the unconscious
It's just a thing we do

Blank Block- by: unknown forgotten

The dinner plate was on the floor
Last weeks leftovers hard and dry
The sun had fallen several hours ago
The lights were on but it still seemed dark
All the walls reached in
Crushing the mind
Outside,
Outside the world went by
Outside,
Outside the world moved effortlessy along
Outside,
It was cold outside.

To Something You'll Never Know- by: unknown forgotten

Woke up slow
This morning
To the sound
Of the stereo
Sunlight rays
Fell downward
Across the room
And off the mirrored glass
I watched
The colors brighten
I was alone
in the motionless room
I thought to myself
I need you to save me

With the head games I play
I drive myself insane

Someday near or far, I'm sure all this will be used against me.